Thursday, January 4, 2018

Day 2: Remember: Georgie's squat-walk to sneak up on my POC (portable oxygen concentrator). Hopefully I can reproduce it to video and post.

Day 3: Birthday lunch with Maddy at her school. Blessing for Kevin. Poor Linda. Max is gone.

Day 4: Maddy was baptized today. So special. My front seat strap above the car door that I grab when I am fearing the driving, pulled right off the door. I guess I pull on it too much.

Day 5: Sunday. Maddy sang every word of every hymn in church. She read her scriptures during the sacrament. She listened and did nothing else during sacrament meeting. She also fasted. So proud of her. At dinner, Josh was wolfing down the lettuce and said, "I LOVE to eat salad!"

Day 6: Lunch with Kevin and coat shopping. Dinner at the Asian Bistro with Cheryl's family. The kids all  love sushi. I'm impressed with them eating foods from different cultures.

Day 7: Flat tire. Josh to me: "I will always love you.". Eating at Brick Oven with my brother and mom.

Day 8: Home again. Mike got lost in the airport trying to find his Green Restaurant.

Wednesday, January 3, 2018

Day 1 of our Jan. trip...AKA A Comical Adventure

4 a.m. All is going well. I'm packed. One pair of black dress pants and every top will coordinate with it. Since I basically only have sandals to go with pants, that is not going to cut it in freezing weather. But...wahlaah. I found some old black leather lace up tennis shoes, and miracle of miracles. THEY FIT! We are just about to head out to the car and I notice my toe sticking out of the shoe. No black shoes??? I hurriedly trashed them, grabbed a pair of white socks and put on white tennis shoes. I'd have to find black shoes in Utah.

What a relief that there was no ice or snow on the road even though the temperature was in the 20's. We arrived with plenty of time to wait at our gate. The boarding time came and went. We were told that there was a broken plane at our gate so we needed to change gates. We did. Our plane was to depart at 7:45 a.m. and at 8 a.m. our plane had not even taxied to the new gate. Finally, they said we could board and we were all standing in line only to wait. Wait, because the next plane for that gate had been entered in the computer and to do that, the computer person pressed the button to say we had departed. That meant that they couldn't scan our boarding passes. Finally, they let some on without scanning, then they scanned the rest when it was fixed, but they were having to count on the plane because we had boarded 2 different ways. We finally left about 8: 45 a.m.

The flight was fine. I was so tired I just put a blanket over me and tried to sleep. Tap. Tap. Tap. The man behind me was telling me my blanket was in the aisle. Ten minutes later. Tap. Tap. Tap. The man behind me is handing me my pillow that had fallen on the floor. Fifteen minutes later, Tap. Tap. Tap. THE SAME MAN managed to pick up my pillow again! I forget what else I dropped, but he tapped me 4 times.

Linda picked us up and let us borrow her car for the remaining time we were to be in Utah. Thanks.

Well, you know I had to get me some black, close-toed shoes, so Mike and I went to Walmart. Yes. Walmart. Six dollar shoes and they fit. I was riding around on one of those motorized shopping carts and Mike went ahead of me, so I was trying to catch up and swung a little too wide in one row and took out a bunch of plastic tubs, so I overcompensated and swung to the left, knocking over a display that cascaded across another aisle like falling dominoes. Mike came running to my rescue while I mumbled about why we needed to stay together and he mumbled something about women drivers.

After checkout, I zoomed (well--rolled) up to the entrance and Mike said he'd go get the car. I waited. and waited, and waited. I stood up, but couldn't leave my cart because I couldn't carry the case of water.  He never came. I sat back down and thought he had forgot where the car was parked. As time went on,...and on... I had visions of him trucking on home, forgetting that he had left me waiting at the store. Finally....he pulled up. I didn't know what to do because I couldn't carry the water, so I drove out the automatic sliding doors and the cart stopped half in and half out. I kept trying to restart the motor, but it was dead. I tried to physically push and pull the cart one way or the other. No luck. The cold air was coming in and I couldn't move. Mike had to get out of the car, get the water, and physically pick up the 'dead' cart to move it out of the door.

Note: Mike knew exactly where the car had been parked in relation to the Walmart entrance. He went to that place and there was no car. He was alarmed. He knew he had parked there. He went up and down rows trying to beep the remote to find the car. After about 4 rows, it occurred to him that we had gone in the other entrance, so his calculations of the location of the car were in relation to the wrong door. :(

On a sad note: President Monson passed away last night. What an example of compassion, service, and kindness. He also did many things to give missionaries and the youth earlier responsibility.

Monday, July 31, 2017

Realization


When I was 21 and came home for vacation from the Y one Sunday, I was ushered into the Bishop’s office. We talked a bit, then he dismissed me. I thought it was odd, so I asked him why he had talked to me. He then told me he had intended to extend a call to be a missionary, but the Spirit had made it known to him that my mission was to teach children and he felt that I needed to finish getting my college degree.

I went home and said, “Whew. I sure escaped that!”

As my parents asked what I had escaped and I reiterated the interview experience, I told them that I wouldn’t be a good missionary because I was afraid of meeting people who I did not know. I will never forget what my father said. A father, who rarely complimented anyone of us, said, “No, Karen. You would have been a great missionary. You put 110% into every calling you have ever had, and it would have been the same with this calling. Your love for the Lord would overpower the fears you have.

Well, I have been thinking a lot about the possibility of going on a mission in the next few years. I always thought I would go,… as if it wasn’t a choice. It was what obedient senior couples do…right? Soooo… I was going to do it. But I have not changed myself since I was a 21 yr. old. I am so fearful of meeting with people that in order to go visiting teaching, I literally cry, shake, and pray to have courage to phone them or meet them. I am afraid of rejection. I am afraid that even if they let me in, they don’t want me there.

The sister missionaries have had me come with them to a nonmember since I have retired and I was very uncomfortable. Mike has had me go to his home teaching families of less-active members…and I am VERY uncomfortable.  We have some very good sister missionaries, who always follow through with us to see how we are doing with those less-active, nonmember people we have committed to fellowship, and I literally find myself hiding from them, because I am so afraid.

I have been praying and praying to say that I would do whatever calling the Lord gives me since my retirement …and with the stake reorganization and ward reorganization finished, in addition to the sister missionaries stepping up to ask me to go with them, I am petrified. What if it is Ward Missionary?

That feeling is so strong, that I am seriously reflecting on my ability to go on a mission after Mike’s retirement. If I am so afraid now, how can I honestly apply to be a missionary? I seriously have so much more respect for my children going on missions. It had to be the scariest thing they have ever done. I can’t even begin to tell you how much I love that they did that… considering many of them have my fears, anxiety, and genetic weaknesses. I am so proud of all of them for taking that step and magnifying whatever they do for the Lord, regardless of their fears. I am so proud of them even now, how they buoy each other up and help each other with their callings.

That being said, I have memories of my Church callings as Relief Society President, Stake and ward Primary Presidents, etc. when I was not afraid. I know I did a good job and I felt I was a good leader, but I have since had many opportunities to be a leader in the educational setting and not been as successful. Perhaps it was because the teachers tend to be pretty aggressive or unconstrained, or that I didn’t have a position of authority over the people with which I was working. Perhaps it is that people in the Church understand the principle of counseling, then falling in line with decisions, but I found that I would not stand up for myself whenever people did not want to do something I was supposed to plan with them; I would back down. I couldn’t set a date and get them to come; they would find something else to do. I guess I just didn’t command their respect, etc. I constantly backed down, and and even worse, let myself be bullied.

However, I remember the changes that happened to me when I was called as a 24 yr. old Relief Society President. Prior to the calling, I had those same agoraphobic tendencies, but after and during the call, I changed. I know that in the setting apart blessing I was given the gift of charity and that gift trumped every fear I had. I truly loved all those sisters…active and/or inactive. There was no fear as I served.

It occurred to me last night that my leadership ability came from the Lord. I don’t own it. I wasn't born with it. It occurred to me that Heavenly Father qualifies those who he calls. As I watched the Sunday school video of those men leaving their families to preach the Gospel for years in a foreign land, I was overpowered with the dedication and faith they had for the Lord as they, too, were afraid. I hope and pray that whatever calling the Lord gives me, that since He knows me, He will not give me more than I can bear at that time, and that He will make me into the person I need to be to truly succeed in the calling that will come.


Sunday, April 2, 2017

Seeing Clearly

It is no surprise to anyone who knows me that I am addicted to food. I suppose I could be more specific and say all dairy products  (love that cheese, butter, milk, and ICE CREAM!) and all products that are sweet. But basically, my weight tells the story, if it's food. Anything I've eaten has been in excess.

I've lost weight before. When I was first diagnosed as hypoglycemic, I had to go to the hospital to have a dietitian make me out a diet with specific caloric intake with specific foods to be eaten at specific times so that my blood sugar would be level and specific amounts to still have me losing weight. The amounts were way less that what I had been used to eating. She had me make a fist and told me that is the size of my stomach. She told me that I should never eat more than that sized amount at a meal. I lost 100 pounds.

Yes, I gained them all back in the ensuing years. I would lose some, then gain more, then lose some, and gain more. Inching up a bit at a time. I'm still not at my top weight, but in January I lost all desire to lose. I would get an ice cream cone at McDonalds and be finished with it by the time I was to Dairy Queen, so I would get another one. Blue Bell's beckoning fingers just lifted me out of traffic as I turned the corner to go by Krogers and couldn't make it. I'd hide the pint containers in the trash, but Mike found most of them. Then there was the candy. I used it in my teaching...not for discipline/bribes, but I really used them for games or simulations we would do. At specific times, I could taste one M n M and next thing you know, it was handfuls and handfuls popped in my mouth at the same time till I finished the Party Pack. Then, of course, I didn't have them the next time I needed them, so I had to buy more. Repeat. Repeat.

February came and there were valentine chocolates! Can't resist them. What also came in February was a letter from my doctor telling me that if I didn't come in for a blood test, he would not renew my prescriptions anymore. Yes. I had been to the doctor in December and since I was a sugar-holic then, I said I would get my blood work elsewhere when I was fasting. He gave me the orders and over the next few months I thought I would have the self-control to get my blood sugar down so he wouldn't say anything. NOT. I never got the blood test as a result.

So, in February, I went in to get a blood test, and in February, he put me on Victoza, a medicine given by daily injection to bring down blood sugar.It worked, and it worked almost immediately. I woke up and was wide awake, no sleepiness hangover I always had. I was stoked.

I had been told that if I ate sugar or overate, that I would be nauseous. I did not have any sugar at all. It was $15 a shot and I certainly did not want to waste money by messing it up with sugar. I did, however discover that even eating a larger-sized salad, did cause me to be ill, so ill that I was throwing up so badly that I had to be sent home from school. But, I thought that eating better, and less of it would help me lose weight. At least that is what I was told and what it advertised.

Ha. The first 2 days I practically ate nothing and gained 3 pounds. Very discouraging. So the weight lose thing wasn't going to work for me, but I was still determined to eat more healthy. I knew my body was ridding itself of all the poisons I had stored, because I had to drink more water to keep from feeling like I had a UTI, plus my face was breaking out in a red rash with each pore full of puss that you know I had to squeeze. I have acne like I never had as a teenager.

Then I noticed my eyes aching. I couldn't read the scriptures at night because my eyes were blurry. I would close my eyes when I could, to keep out the light and relieve the strain of being able to focus.When one Friday and Saturday came I was panicking that I was going blind. The eye doctor was not open, but I was really feeling like in one more day I would be blind. I was imagining what my life would be like. I covered my eyes because they were too painful to open and prayed...then I heard the commercial for Victoza on TV tell one of their side effects--blurry and double vision. Once again, the Lord rescued me in a time of need. I prayed to know what to do. I ate fruit for the first time ever since taking Victoza, and my vision got a bit better, but it was still not good.and my eyes ached. I knew I needed to get off Victoza. In two days, I had gone off Victoza and 2 days later, I went to the doctor.

I am off Victoza, but on a sugar-free diet. I went to the eye doctor and in 3 months, my vision had changed drastically from the glasses I had received in December, so I have a new pair coming. I have a cataract in my left eye (my good eye) and a puckered retina in my right eye. I really feel like an old lady with those.

The moral of this dilemma is please, please, don't eat sugar. It is my poison! It will manifest itself and the alternative is not as good as just eating healthy foods in the first place. And....don't eat junk food. It will come out on your face as well as your figure. (My acne continues as I lose weight.) And don't eat so much that you stretch your stomach out. That will make it hard to fast and to lose weight. But please, don't do sugar. I will never get my sight back to what it was...and if I don't get rid of the fat on my body and the sugar it accumulated, I will have to deal with another medicine for Diabetics that will have side effects. It is not worth it. Please change your diets and the diets of your children.

P.S. If there are typos, it is because I can't focus on the screen.

p.p.s. The doctor said that me being outside everyday for recess without sunglasses caused the cateract.

Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Anna Catherine

Found...her parents. I sealed her to them today. Wonderful feeling to place her in a family with an obvious hole where she belonged. I can't imagine the joy she felt, for I was led to find her family more than once and there were too many 'coincidences' found on the way.

Sunday, November 6, 2016

Fall/Winter Came to Houston today...

...at least in the church. It must have been 40-50 degrees blowing on me the whole sacrament meeting. It was so freezing all I could do was watch the clock slowly passing instead of hearing testimonies. After the meeting I thought I'd go outside to get warm, but it was not 90 degrees anymore; it was in the 70's and that just didn't cut it when I was so freezing, so I went to the car, found a towel and covered me with it and ran the heater for at least 15 minutes to get warm. I went to SS. hoping it would be warmer. They had turned up the thermostat, so it wasn't as cold. I was wrapped in a beach towel, shivering. By RS the AC was back on again. I ran the heater all the way home, at lots of roast beef and soaked in a hot tub.

Monday, September 5, 2016

Heavenly Father Loves His Children

I sat in Relief Society and had a brief 'Pity Party' as they talked about all the new beginnings we would have as the children went to school and we'd have all the free time to do all the things we wanted to do, but couldn't during the summer. I've never had a time when I had the school year to myself without any children. I went even further in my 'Pity Party' to think that this summer I hadn't done anything productive because I was traveling or babysitting.

It had been quite an eye-opening summer as far as grandchildren. Surprise, surprise. They aren't perfect! None of them. In fact, each one has something that you, their parents, have had to work with. You have confided these things to me. I saw those unique children first hand...and marveled at the wisdom and non-coincidences that you are parents to the spirits of children you not only can handle, but understand. You nurture them, love them, and I see the weaknesses of each child turned into strengths. I returned home, happy that you were the parents you were and thought that was that. But..I love them all. I see their great spirits. I see the good in them.


As school has started, I have had some repeat 'offenders' in my classes. I say offenders, because in many cases, they were so hard to handle in 3rd grade that I was not happy to have them in my 5th grade class. In one case, a parent removed a child from my class before school even started because at meet the teacher, they saw another child in my class. I could have predicted it. I knew why. Nevertheless, I have not second-guessed the Lord in these placements and although I could have asked  to not have those students, I kept them.. I know that my teaching is a calling, so I cannot have all the 'perfect' students for it to be so. But as I have seen repeated negative behavior and reached out to each child, I have had spiritual experiences with each one. The Lord has said to me, 'Here is a child with the behavior of _____________( and it would be one of my grandchildren). He/she deserves your love just as if they were your grandchild. Treat them like that."

It has happened so frequently this year that as I recalled those instances while sitting in Relief Society, the tears kept coming as I realized how much Heavenly Father loves all his children...not just my grandchildren. I hope that my grandchildren get teachers who love them the way their parents and I do.


And yes, I do have one perfect student in my class. The perfectly-behaved gifted child, who gets along with everyone, gets 100's, I overheard her talking to the other 'patrols' the first day about the kindergarteners' behavior and how they didn't do anything she said. I said, "It kind of makes you appreciate your kindergarten teacher more, doesn't it?" She thought about it, and before she left (and every day after, she said/says, 'Thank you for being my teacher."


When Angels Play

 I've already written in my autobiography about the time I prayed for an angel's voice for my solo, and after it was over, the bisho...